Mental Health During Quarantine

Yes, that picture above is of me. No filter, eyebrows a mess, and is that a speck of blanket fuzz on my head? Most likely. 

We have all been having a hard time lately. Whether it be your kids driving you nuts during the lock-down or being an essential employee that doesn't get a break, everyone is going through their own thing. 

A lot of friends have been texting me or I've been seeing them on social media about how sad they've become. Bad mental health is at an all time high right now. Even though we're having enough time to focus on ourselves, a lot of people aren't doing it. They're anxious. They're feeling trapped. It's just not a good scene in the mental health community right now. 

Which is why I'm making this post. I'm not a doctor and a lot of people expect me to be. I can't fulfill that roll for you. What I CAN do though is give advice for things that I've been through, what I've been feeling, and what is helping me. 

I hope this post can give you some hope during this pandemic. I've done some research and put things together for you guys. Mental health is always just as important as your physical health and I think people are seeing that more now than ever!!

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Self Care During Quarantine 

Yes, self care is more than face masks. Here's some of my favorite things to do (and some things I want to do...) to keep you busy and keep your mind going a bit!

-Get dressed up (and then take cute pictures of your outfits!)

-Exercise. Take a walk outside or do an at-home YouTube workout! My friend Melissa has some workout videos on her Instagram for inspiration and this one is my favorite: X

-Give yourself a break from the news. I haven't watched TV in a week. I still get my news from Facebook usually but Twitter has also been SO negative recently so I usually just scroll on by.

- Try a new recipe. I made Crispy Baked Artichoke Hearts from this recipe here: X. Let me tell you, AMAZING!! Shout out to Natalia for the vegan blog recommendation! Now, here's a recipe that my friend Claudia wrote out that I'm DYING to make:
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Low Carb/Keto/Fat-Head Dough Pizza

Ingredients:

 Dough:

·         ¾ cup almond flour

·         1 egg

·         2 oz. cream cheese

·         2 cups mozzarella cheese

·         1 tsp salt

·         1 tsp pepper

·         1 tsp Italian season (can add more/other seasoning to your desire)

                

Toppings:

·         Mozzarella cheese (or cheese blend) (amount is to your liking)

·         Low-carb sauce (I typically use Rao’s, but it can be expensive. I found Paesana Vodka Sauce actually have 1 less carb. I usually just read the labels at the store and get the cheapest low carb lol) (again, amount to your liking – usually ½ cup-ish)

·         Any other toppings (pepperoni, other cheese, veggies (careful some can be high carb)

·         Walmart also sells “sugar free” (brand is G Hughes) sauces like barbeques and hickory and honey mustard. Sometimes I’ll do a BBQ chicken pizza instead of tomato sauce, but I use the dough recipe. The more familiar you get with it, the more you can tweak your dough and toppings to your liking.

Instructions:

1.       Preheat oven to 425 degrees F.

2.       In microwave safe bowl, add 2 cups of mozzarella cheese and 2 ounces of cream cheese.

3.       Microwave for 1 minute. Mix.

4.       Microwave for 30 seconds. Mix.

5.       Let cheese cool down before adding more (you don’t want to cook the egg)

6.       Add egg, seasonings, and almond flour.

7.       Mix well. Note that it may not be completely consistent or like one smooth dough (that’s normal, just do your best)

8.       Either on parchment paper or I use silicone baking mats, put a thin layer of olive oil (or any oil) so the dough doesn’t stick.

9.       Flatten out dough on paper or mat. I usually put some oil on my hands or also use rubber gloves when pushing the dough out (I hate the texture and the mess).

10.   Once dough is flat (to the thickness of your liking, but not too thin because it will rip when you flip it), place in over for 10 minutes.

11.   After 10 minutes (give or take depending on how you like it), flip the dough.

12.   Bake for 5 more minutes (give or take).

13.   Take dough out of over and add toppings.

14.   Place back in over for about 5 minutes (I eyeball the pizza until it looks good).

15.   Take out pizza when it looks good and let it sit for about 5 minutes for the cheese to cool. This is important because the dough is also cheese and it may slide/fall apart when you try to cut it if it’s too melty.

16.   Enjoy 😊

Makes roughly 3-4 servings (8-ish slices, slices/serving)

Dough (roughly): Calories: 300, Total Carbohydrates: 6g, Fiber: 2g, Net Carbohydrates: 4g, Total Fat: 24g, Protein: 18g

(toppings add to nutrition facts)

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-Read a good book (Not to brag but you can follow my book blog here: X. I do have to say though, don't read The Wife Between Us. A bestseller apparently, but I have no idea how). 

Instagram Accounts to Cheer You Up (or At Least Gives You Nice Pictures to Look At)

- Lwuce . Lucy is beautiful and talented and an all around caring soul. I have been obsessed with her art and outfits since day one. I think my first DM to her was something like "do you go to art school? Because you should." Her pictures always make me happy!

-Girlboss- If you're down and out about your job, your side hustle not going well, or your creative mind not thriving, Girlboss is for you. I am constantly inspired by their posts. ALSO! Sign up for their email list because right now they're sending out amazing emails that have gotten my brain juices FLOWING!

- Jade Louise Pye - Not to brag, but I know her. No big deal. BUT just because I call her a friend, doesn't mean she has a great Instagram. Well, thank God she DOES. Jade is a beautiful person (and is always there to listen to me rant about life) and her pictures on Instagram are gorgeous to look at. Whether it be a selfie of her and whatever she's doing at the moment, I'm always think to myself "she takes the best picture angles...."

-Mavis Slade- Can I stop being friends with cool people? Apparently not...Mavis is one of my favorite people on this Earth. If I had a million and one dollars, I would give it to her because when she thrives, I thrive for her. Her Instagram is so aesthetically pleasing that I'm 100% in awe of it all the time. It's like a pink hue with a bit of purple and a dash of blue sometimes? You should just check it out.

How to Be Outgoing Via the Internet 

Zoom- I have had 3 morning coffee dates and about 3 wine nights via the Zoom app. I have never used it on my computer but apparently it's a lot more fun that way? But I use my phone and it has connected me to friends in times when I need them the most. For the free version, you can only talk for 40 minutes, so you can always use FaceTime to talk to people who are close friends.

Live- Instagram Live is VERY popular right now. What Instagram Live is, is where you can make a live video for your followers on Instagram to watch you. I did it once and talked about mental health and it was SO much fun! Miley Cyrus and other celebrities are using Instagram Live as a "talk show" platform, too, which is cool. Facebook Live is also an option. I feel like it's used by older adults a lot more than younger ones, but it's still a live video and can reach many people!

Phone Call- I literally called my friend Nicole and ranted to her about my life the other day. Just a simple phone call. She reached out, I reached back. As easy as that! Check in with people. Schedule phone calls to get things off your chest. It's nice, trust me. 

When You're Feeling Alone

Call4Calm- My state of Illinois in the United States just started something called Call4Calm: a free emotional support text line, for Illinois residents experiencing stress and mental health issues related to COVID-19. 

For this text line, here's some more information:

"Individuals who would like to speak with a mental health professional can text “TALK"— or for Spanish, “HABLAR"—to 552020. Individuals will remain anonymous, and within 24 hours they will receive a call from a counselor employed by a local community mental health center to provide support.

Individuals can also text the number, using key words such as “unemployment," “food," or "shelter" and will receive information on how navigate and access support and services"

Crisis Text Line- I used to volunteer for this text line and they are ready and willing to take your texts. Please text "HOME" to 741741 if you are feeling isolated, stressed, sad, anything you'd like help with. But remember, these people are there to HELP you. If you do not accept things they are trying to help you with, this is not the text line for you.

NAMI- The National Alliance on Mental Illness has helped friends of mine AND ME. They are sending emails on how to help yourself during this time (so make sure you sign up on their webpage!) but you can also read things on their site to make you feel more at peace right now. They have a linked page to The Guardian article that I enjoy that sets my mind a little more at ease. Click here for the article: X

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If you liked this post and would like to see another one like it, I would love to write one! I always have ideas roaming around my head! I hope everyone is staying SAFE and staying 6 FEET AWAY! I don't care if you're at Target, 6 FEET PEOPLE! 

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Life Update: April 2020

My last post on here was February 27th 2020 and I'm SORRY! I started a book blog (just a little side blog) and that's been taking up some time. But certain people have been asking how I've been recently and I'd like to address things and tell you ALL about me right now. 

March 2020 was the worst month for my family. Things going on with my grandma, my mom having bronchitis then tearing her meniscus (her knee, which she's not able to go to the doctor about because everything is closed), then the stupid virus, and THEN on March 31st, I got diagnosed with diabetes. 

I've been having symptoms for a while but then I started having really bad symptoms at work. I was getting dizzy and wanted to faint and get sick at the same time. I never told anyone at work because I have this thing about calling off work. I feel like my team needs me to work. It's weird but I never let on something was really wrong with me. I didn't even tell my mom until I was at the post office right before the quarantine started and my left palm went numb suddenly. 

I was pre-diabetic a couple years ago and my mom's side of the family has a lot of diabetes so I had an inkling on what was going on. I was peeing a lot. I was drinking so much water. I was getting headaches when I have only had a couple headaches in my entire life. My feet were numbing on and off for about 2 years. Then my hand. 

I drove home that day from the post office and sat in my driveway, googling things. I felt like I knew what I had. But I couldn't go to the doctor because of the virus. So when it came to March 31st at work, I finally told my boss I wasn't feeling well and I went by myself to immediate care.

The doctor there took some tests and told me "hey, we try not to send anyone to the ER because of the virus, but you NEED to go. Your blood sugar is way too high."

Long story short of the time in the ER, but I couldn't have my mom go with me (no visitors), I had blood tests, lots of finger pricks, and an IV that I cried at when it was put in. It was a mess. But then the results came in. The doctor there said I have diabetes but I need to keep tracking my blood sugar to make sure. 

I left, ate a Snickers bar that was in my purse, then set up an over the phone appointment with my primary doctor. I got some more tests done in the coming days. Lots of blood, lots of urine. 

I got some results back and my doctor was shocked. My blood sugar was astronomical, I had a crazy a1c level, high cholesterol, and my liver enzymes were so high that he told me "there is so much wrong". I have to go back in for more tests.

I was forced into having a dietitian. I have my first over the phone appointment a few days ago and I was nice and she was nice but I was over it. I am overweight. Losing weight is HARD. Especially since I'm on so many medication that makes me gain weight. I also don't stick to diets. 2 weeks max. I'm so picky with food that I don't even try. So, as you can tell, I was a little angry at all this. 

My feelings were and still ARE all over the place. I'm angry then sad then I pout then I'm angry again. People who don't have diabetes or haven't dealt with it don't understand how difficult it is. At least at first. It's a huge lifestyle change, especially for me. I don't want to go to work anymore because I know I'll be dizzy and sick every day until this is under control, which could take a whole year. I'm just in a rough place. I literally pouted because I couldn't have a flour tortilla the other day. 

I'm already tired of bland (healthy) food and it's only been a week. I want to cry writing this. As a person who is addicted to food, this is, as I keep saying, HARD. 

So, going through more tests and more time learning about my body and educating myself about food is in my future. 

I wanted to put some facts I learned from my dietitian though!! It's all a learning experience, I'm trying to remind myself that everyday. 

-64 oz of water a day is what you need to aim for 

-White bread spikes your blood sugar so high than an hour later, it crashes

-Aim for under 80 carbs a day at first 

-When you eat a carb, you need to follow it with a protein every time

- Light cheese is great for diabetics 

(I'm going to have weekly sessions with her so when I learn more, I would be happy to share it!)

Yep, that's my life right now. I would love to get back into writing but we'll see when I have time!

 

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My New Room

I'm a hoarder. Kind of. Maybe? Probably. I keep a lot of things in my bedroom. I still live with my parents so my bedroom is all I have and I keep everything in there. It's not very big, no matter what pictures are shown of it. So my pack of STUFF just keeps piling up; on my ratty desk, on my floor, in the corners of my closet. I finally realized that I need a change and make everything different. Including painting my room and getting new furniture. My walls were painted (by only me) in 2012 and they were dark blue with a very bright British Flag on the accent wall. I did a pretty good job back then, but I remember absolutely nothing about doing it back then, so I was on my own...again. 

(This is a 'clean picture')

(You get the gist; I'm messy)

I wanted a more grown up room. More posh. I was known for my English room, but I feel like it wasn't ME anymore. I see all these girls on Instagram who have beautiful and simple rooms. I know I can never be a minimalist because of all my things and my love for hanging things on my walls, but I wanted to try. 

WHITE PAINT IT WAS! 

I had no idea what I was getting myself into...I really didn't.

Paint was so expensive that I paid over  $100 for 2 cans. I was shocked and kind of mad? AND THAT WAS JUST THE WHITE PRIMER! NOT THE PAINT! I got some tools like brushes and stuff that made my bank account cry a tiny bit. I brought the primer home and cleaned up my room and threw away SO much stuff. I went through my whole life it seemed like, throwing things out from middle school and putting so much in my "this needs to go in a garage sale" pile. It was as clean as I was going to get it. I pushed my bed and piled stuff onto it so I could paint a wall and had no idea where to start, so I went on taping the edges. Then I filled my tiny holes in my walls with white toothpaste (a Pinterest hack). DON'T DO IT! It left oil on my walls? I ended up using my dad's almost dried up spackle because it was better than the toothpaste "hack". 

(You can kind of see the oil spots in this picture)

I took a roller and slapped on some primer on my wall and told myself I couldn't go back now. Was I doing it right? Most likely not, but for one blue wall, it took 2 coats of primer because of the dark color. It was surreal to paint my flag wall because I couldn't undo it. A new time for me. I ended up sweating my butt off day after day, moving things around my room and painting my walls by myself. Friends wanted to help me paint, but my room was so small and I looked terrible that I told them I could do it myself. It took me a couple days to finish priming and I spent day to night in my room on my days off work getting paint all over my clothes. 

I went to the store to buy more paint and my money once again went down the drain...so sad. And then I painted one wall. And I was done. As in, I was fed up. 2 coats of white paint on one wall. I was aching and not having a good time anymore. The flag wall? A total of 5 coats! My arms felt like they were going to fall off and I didn't even THINK about painting the ceiling. It completely eluded my mind. So that was another thing to paint. 

My friend Ashley came over and helped me paint for a quick 2 days and it really helped. I thought it was never going to get done because I almost gave up. The worst part was that I kept ordering new furniture and had to keep the boxes they were in, in my room. Which took up so much more room. I was dumb.

But it got finished. Finally. FINALLY. It wasn't perfect in the least (especially the corners of the room) and the ceiling we DID give up on, so it looks like clouds instead of pure white. Which I kind of like. Ashley helped me build my furniture. And by 'helped', I mean she built it for me. Thanks, Ashley! I got a bed frame for the first time since I was young, an actual desk to put stuff on and a tall bookcase that I'm in love with. My color scheme is white, blush pink, and gold. I still have some finishing touches to do (repainting some other furniture and getting curtains) but I'm in love with my new room. 

In love. 

*After this last picture was taken, I DID get a white bed skirt. Thank the lord; it needed it*

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Top 5: February 2020

I know Top 5's aren't very popular on this blog, but honestly, I love them. And I love sharing what I LOVE! So here's the first one I've written in a while! 

1) Anthony Diaz Photography. Anthony is THE best photographer I have worked with and he's made me feel beautiful, even when I've never felt beautiful before. His editing skills are amazing and his artistic direction is out of this world. He's not afraid to get dirty to get the right angle. This isn't even sponsored. I just love him. He takes clients through the northwest suburbs (but ask him directly if you're somewhere else!) His pricing is something you can ask him about too! Right now, you can contact him through Instagram or his email! 

Instagram: XX

Email:XX

Here's some shots he's taken of me!

2) Cocokind. Now, my skin is weird. It's dry but I still get pimples. I have tried different toners recently (Kylie Skin made me have disgustingly huge pimples) and Thayer's made me break out in whiteheads. So I followed a friend's advice and tried Cocokind, a clean skin care. I got the Rosewater Facial Toner and the Facial Repair Oil. When I started using the toner, it smelled a bit, but it subsided eventually. I have never put actual oil on my face but the facial repair oil made all my dry spots disappear. I was in shock. I haven't used anything since and I only get some pimples around my "time of the month". You can get some Cocokind at Target now too! (GOD BLESS). 

Here's some links for Cocokind:

Instagram XX

Website: XX

Target: XX

3) Which Wich. This is a sub sandwich place and it's better than Subway (sorry Subway. Still love you). There's a location about 15 minutes away from my house and I'm always so giddy when I hear we're going there, even though I'm 26 years old. Remember Quizno Subs? I hated that place because when they toasted my sandwich, they always burnt it a bit. Some people love it, well, I hate it. BUT Which Wich will toast it JUST the right amount. It'll melt the cheese, but not the bun. They have a cool way of taking your order too: via paper sandwich bag. So, when you walk in, you take a paper bag and then it'll ask you what you want on it and you just check it off on your bag. You bring the bag up to the cashier, then you pay and your order is set! I suggest buying a reusable cup if you can remember to bring it back next time because it's a cheaper price every time you bring it!

They have a lot of locations (I think...at least by me they do...), just type in your zip code and see what's around!

Website: XX

4) Brunch. I had my first ever brunch for Valentine's Day at my house. It was a bit chaotic (my fault) because I've never really cooked breakfast food before. Good things I had my friends who came over help me because I was god awful at even cooking sausage patties. THANKS FRIENDS! We ended up having a fun time and played a couple rounds of bingo with prizes I bought. Also, waffle mix with a little bit of vanilla is delicious, I learned!

5) Cherry Jungle Juice. Yes, this is alcoholic. Beware. I ended up finding this recipe on Pinterest but then did my own version. I wanted something red or pink for my Valentine's Day party. Here's what I put together:

-Cherry 7-UP

-Vodka (or whipped vodka, but I didn't know what that was nor could I find it)
-Champagne (I used Cook's spumante. NOT brut!)

-Cherry Juice (just a dash from a jar of Maraschino cherries) 

Not too much alcohol, to be honest. Depends how much vodka you want, but a little goes a long way. I put in more champagne in than vodka. I'm obsessed with cherries so I added some to the bottom of the glass, too. It's REALLY good and it's the only thing I drank that day, even though I had lots of options to drink...It didn't get me "buzzed" at all, so it's pretty safe, as jungle juice goes!

Thanks for reading this Top 5, guys!

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My First Solo Vacation

I have put all over social media how I went on vacation by myself and even made a lame Vlog on it (I'm not good with YouTube videos. I'm awkward). So pretty much everyone knows I went on vacation. But I wanted to write a post on it for people who didn't watch the Vlog and also add some little things I never mentioned before! 

I have wanted to go on vacation by myself for years. I wanted to go out of the country by myself but I finally thought rationally and decided to do something IN the country. I am a weird type of person: I am independent but I also love people. I go out to dinner alone but then want to get ice cream with someone when I'm sad. This trip was something I wanted to experience, to see if I was okay alone. 

I had 2 weeks off from work (no one knows why. I just wasn't scheduled) and decided suddenly that I wanted to go somewhere. I mean, I had the time. Maybe not the money, though...Anyway, I didn't care where I went, as long as I could drive there. I went on the Airbnb app for the first time and just started searching. I found a seemingly cute place in Minneapolis, Minnesota. 

MINNESOTA IT WAS, THEN!  

It was about a 6 hour drive from where I am in Illinois. I've done that before, maybe a little less, because some of my friends live about an hour and a half away from Minneapolis. I've visited them a few times. So I certainly could drive 6 hours by myself. I booked that Airbnb right away so no one would take it. 

I was so excited that I started packing a week early. I delved into Google: what I could do there and what I could eat for meals. I had a good list picked out in couple days. I was pumped. 

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When it was the day to pack up and go, I woke up early, made coffee and packed all my stuff into my car. Which, I pack way too much and it looked like I was staying for a week and I was only staying for 3 nights. I started driving and put on a playlist that I made. 

By hour 2 of driving, I was dead bored. I stopped at a McDonald's to get something to drink but I really needed a break. ALREADY?! Geez, Megan. By the time I finally reached Minnesota, I was almost asleep. Until I ran into  I-94. I had no idea that it was a terrible highway. I was almost at my Airbnb but then I took I-94 (which runs in the middle of the city) and almost puked because the traffic was so scary and my anxiety was so bad. It was...just an all around terrible experience. 

I reached my little house and I was staying on the top floor (there were only 2 floors). When I walked in, it was creaky so I let out a little "Hello? Someone here?" There was no one, so I felt better. I unpacked and got ready right away to go out to eat for dinner. 

A couple days prior, I booked a reservation at a place called Hell's Kitchen (NOT related to Gordon Ramsey). It's slogan was "damn good food." I was excited. I took a breather at the house for a few hours, then left in my car to go get dinner. I, once again, had to take I-94. Not a fun time. I also forgot about parking. Parking was not free in Minneapolis. At least at all the places I went to. I had to pay $7 for ramp parking, which isn't bad, but honestly, that's $7 wasted. 

The food at Hell's Kitchen? AMAZING. I got the deviled eggs and the creamy mac and cheese (with a hint of pepper jack). It was the best mac and cheese I've ever had. Such a great experience. 

When I got home that night, I found something out: my bed was on a loft level, which you need to climb a ladder to get to. I knew that. What I didn't know: I couldn't climb the ladder. It was straight up, no tilt, and I'm chunky. I just...couldn't do it. So I tried sleeping on the couch that first night. Long story short, the Airbnb turned out to be crappy and old and the pipes wouldn't stop pumping water, so I didn't sleep. 

The next day, I got up early and went to a coffee shop called 7 Corners. Once again, I had to pay for ramp parking. For a cup of coffee. So ridiculous. The coffee, as it turned out, was also not very good. I mean, it wasn't terrible, but the caramel latte was more bitter than most I've had. I decided afterwards to go see Minnehaha Falls, a waterfall in Minneapolis. There was snow everywhere at the time and everything was frozen (just to paint a picture). I paid for parking ($3.25) at a public park, then set off the find the waterfall. It turned out that I couldn't get close to it because the steps to it were frozen, but I still got some good pictures. It was a beautiful site. I was the only one around and it was peaceful with the sun shinning on such a cold day. 

I then went to the "Stone Arch". It was a bridge walkway, pretty much. Still had to pay for parking. 

I paid for a planetarium ticket beforehand and I was scheduled to watch a show at 4:00 pm, so I took a Lyft because I was completely done driving on I-94. The show? Fantastic. It was 20 minutes of a movie that shows how the Earth is all connected (super cool) then 20 minutes of a young college kid named Scott showing what our sky would look like that night. I was the only one in the showing and it was cool to ask questions (Pluto is not a real planet, guys. I asked). 

That night I went to Psycho Suzi's Motor Lounge. A Tiki bar! I took a Lyft and had a great time by myself. Amazing drinks and such friendly bartenders. I ate 15 cherries that night, and I consider that WILD. I guess in the summertime, you can go outside and sit by the river, but it was 12 degrees out that day. 

That night, I only slept 2 hours because of the creaky house and pipes. The next day, I stayed home because I was exhausted. I ordered in breakfast (the coffee was bad there too. What's with Minnesota coffee?!) and then took a 3 hour nap. I ordered dinner that night too. I just didn't leave that day, and only heard my own voice to say "thank you" to the delivery drivers. 

I left the next day. I packed up, not sorry that I wasn't sad to say goodbye. I met up with my friend for breakfast (remember, she lives an hour and a half away) on my way home. That was so much fun catching up. Then, I had 5 more hours to drive home. 

SO. BORED. 

Music couldn't even save my boredom. 

When I finally got home, I reflected on my trip. It turns out that I was pretty lonely. Staying in a place by myself was fun at first but then I had no one to physically talk to. I would never stay at that Airbnb again. I did enjoy getting up early for breakfast and not waking anyone up. And the best part of the trip was the planetarium show. 

Would I do it again? Maybe. Depends. 

Am I glad I did it? Most definitely. 

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DIY Mood Board

An ad popped up on Facebook for an event near me: "Attend a mood/vision board party! Pay $10 and bring supplies!" I thought $10 was a little steep but they DID say they would have snacks...

For those of you who don't know what a mood board is, it's a piece of cardboard or other such things and you stick on pictures and magazine cut outs on it to make it look pretty. Things you enjoy, like pictures of flowers, or a sticker of a smiley face. It's a collage, pretty much. Super simple thing to do yet very fun. I ALSO found out that you can be online mood boards but that's less fun!

I decided not to attend the party because it WAS kinda far for me and I wasn't a fan of going to a thing like that alone. 

My friend Lexi reached out to me a couple days later saying that it would be a fun time if we got together, drank some wine, and had our own mood board-making "party". I said yes right away! So I invited her over on a cold and snowy night and had a great time talking and pasting pictures. I wanted to do a simple step-by-step for those who have no idea how to make a mood board. 

Here we go!

Step 1: Supplies. I already had a square cardboard piece from something but Lexi needed to buy a "base" for her pictures. She chose a push pin board, which is a really good size. Then you need magazines, glue, tape, scissors and whatever you have lying around! I had some embellishments in my room so I included those in the pile of supplies. You can go to a craft store or even Target to get stuff! 

* We added a bottle of wine to our supplies list. This is not needed ;)

Step 2: Start Cutting. After I glued on a pretty background to my cardboard, I started flipping through magazines like crazy. I cut out anything that caught my attention. Lexi had a couple ideas what she wanted to put on her board because she was smart and thought of what goals she would like to achieve before we started. I, however, just winged it. I didn't have too many things, minimalism at it's finest, but I had things I liked. I started to rearrange them on my board. 

Step 3: Glue. I took a glue stick (you want the stick kind of glue, the liquid will be bumpy and ruin the pictures) and started gluing my pictures on. Lexi bought a lot of cute tape to add to the board so I used tape along with the glue to make it pop. She also bought me stickers that I started adding, too.

Step 4: Admire your work. Different people take different times in creating art. Lexi took a while; I took 15 minutes. And both of them turned into things we liked. At first, I kept saying mine looked like a 6 year old made it but I actually think it's cute now! Lexi got way more creative than me and her's is AWESOME. 

(Lexi's final board)

(My final board)

I chose a Little Women picture from the new movie because that movie made a real connection with me, I chose the phrase "grateful to be alone" because I need to practice more of being alone AND being grateful in my life, and I chose stickers of England because I'm going there this year! 

Lexi and I had a great time chatting, drinking sweet wine, and being all around creative. You don't even need a friend with you to make a mood board; making one alone is also really fun. 

Now, get some magazines, some cardboard, and start gluing! 

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Review: Manic by Halsey

As soon as I heard the singer Halsey was putting out a new album, I was excited. 

Then as soon as I heard she named her album, Manic, I was suddenly a little put off. 

Halsey has bipolar and every fan of her knows it. I have bipolar and almost everyone who knows me knows it. I don't hide it and Halsey doesn't either. 

I get a little upset how mental illness is portrayed in some movies these days because having depression is not "fun" or "cute". The manic pixie dream girl is over played. 

So when I saw on Twitter that Halsey's new album was called Manic, I was upset. Here we go again, having people think being manic is a good ol' time.

God, MY manic episodes are scary and not fun or cool at all. I don't sleep, I have to keep going, I shake. I was really hoping Halsey wasn't putting manic episodes in a good light. I messaged her a calm message on Twitter asking her to explain what the title meant, but of course, she didn't respond. 

I put on Twitter, publicly, about how I hope she wasn't glorifying mental illness. And this random girl on Twitter went and attacked me via words. "SHE'S BIPOLAR, SHE HAS MANIC EPISODES, SHE CAN DO WHAT SHE WANTS! SHE'S BIPOLAR! SHE HAS FREE REIGN." I responded with a nice "I do too and manic episodes are not a good time." This girl tried to fight with me again but I didn't respond.  

So when the album came out, I put the name of out my mind and listened to it, judgement free. Halsey told fans to listen to the songs in order because it's a whole "experience". So I sat down and listened. Without doing a complete song-by-song, here's what I thought:

The first half of the album, I was sad. But not in a way people think. I was sad that all she sings about is needing a man to live. She sings (a lot)  about how she needs validation from a man that she'll she fine. I know people like that personally and I feel sad for THEM too. A girl I know physically gets sick and mentally bad when she doesn't have a man or a relationship. I just...can't fathom. Maybe Halsey is the same way. I hope Halsey is getting therapy. 

I did like the song '3am' because it's catchy plus I understood her lyrics a lot. She sings about how it's 3am and she's trying to contact everyone through her phone. It's obviously talking about mania because I've been through the same thing where I need to TALK, not about anything particular, but my mind is running. But like I said, it's catchy. 

I don't like any of the 'interludes'. I give her credit for actually singing on them, because most bands just play music during their interludes and it's so boring to me. But short songs don't "WOW" me. Especially these. 

It took me about 6 full plays to really like the song "Finally//beautiful stranger". Now, I think it's great. Still about needing a man. But very velvet sounding and her vocals really come out. 

"You should be sad". What a great song. It's FINALLY a song about saying BUH BYE to a toxic man. And you guys know I love any song that catchy. The music video doesn't really fit the sound, but I kind of still love it?

"killing boys" is dumb. That's all I'll say.  

The worst song, obviously in my opinion, is More. God, I hate saying that because it's about her miscarriages. I've been listening to this album on repeat for hours and this song is so....skip-able. There's no beat. I don't care if it's not a typical pop song, but it's a semi-acoustic. The words are very deep and since I can't connect to this song, it's hard for me to like. I don't WISH I could connect either, given the circumstances she's been through, but I hope other people like it. 

The second to last song is "Still Learning" and it's about how she's still learning to love herself. That no one actually knows her and she's trying her best. And even though it's not a particular peppy pop song that you can tap your toes to, the words are really great. It's an insight to her life and it's nice to hear that she owns up to her mistakes when needed.

My absolute favorite song is 929. It's just about her. That's it. Catchy, people can relate but also people can't relate, and it tells a story. I don't really know if it's a 'song' but it's great. Now THAT is what mania is and she's not exploiting it, she telling about how it's affected her. 

I applaud her. 

Everyone is different. Everyone's mental illness is different. Halsey has life success, I live in my bedroom in Illinois. Our mania is different. It's sometimes difficult for me to hear her talk about her episodes because I used to wish I had money to be Halsey's type of manic. But hearing this album, even though she has the money and the fame, she sounds like she's still suffering like me. 

All in all, I give this album 

8/10

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